Ruth’s comment on my last post read, in part: “I’m weary and tired of this journey….” Soon after reading it, I read these words in my husband’s devotional book, Jesus Calling:
“Come to me for rest and refreshment. The journey has been too much for you, and you are bone-weary.”
There are moments like that of such grace, such gentle tenderness, that it’s absolutely clear to me that the Lord understands everything we’re going through. Still, when the suffering continues, when exhaustion threatens to leave us in a heap on the ground, we’re tempted to conclude: He may understand, but He sure doesn’t care.
Consider the next few sentences from today’s devotion:
“See it [your exhaustion] as an opportunity for Me to take charge of your life. Remember that I can fit everything into a pattern for good, including the things you wish were different. Start with where you are at this point in time and space, accepting that this is where I intend you to be.”
That means, let go.
You have to find a way to make peace with the idea that this journey is no accident. You are here for a reason. It’s where Jesus wants you to be — for a purpose. Struggling to stay in faith without knowing precisely what that purpose is remains one of the greatest challenges of infertility.
“Much of your weariness results from your constant battle against the world, the flesh and the devil.”
Sound too strong? Even melodramatic? Think of it this way…
Are you sick of magazine cover stories about pregnant teens? Of hearing friends and family members joyfully announce, “I’m pregnant”? Of feeling tempted to indulge your bad moods with a few choice words, or your frustration with another bout of tears? Of doubting your hope, questioning your faith, and wishing you did have the power to play God just this once?
That’s the constant battle He’s talking about – and we’re all fighting it, all the time.
So, how do we renew our hope? Strengthen our faith? And set aside the desire to be God, so that He can do that in our lives?
“… do not give up! Hope in Me, for you will again praise Me for the help of My presence.”
In other words, realize that your mindset determines your proximity to Christ. He never moves. He never abandons or forsakes you. NEVER. “I am with you always.” You can choose to draw near to Him by bringing Him your burdens – of fear, fatigue, confusion, despair, grief and anger. He has promised, “I will give you rest.”
How? By the peace-giving power of His presence.
Do you find it impossible to sense that presence?
Then lay down. Close your eyes. Breathe deeply. Slowly. Rest your hands on your belly and let it rise… and fall….rise… and fall…rise… and fall. And then ask Him, “Jesus, do you know how tired I am? My spirit needs to rest. Please, give me peace.”
I promise, He will.