In the midst of the infertility journey, how can you be assured of what you hope for when it’s not happening? How can you find peace in the midst of uncertainty and anxiety? How can you trust a God you’re struggling to understand?
Listen.
Is it possible to hear God speak to you? Maybe in the Old Testament… but these days? It would be wonderful to have dreams or visions, like the prophets did. Or better yet, real-time appearances by God – like Abraham. Even overhearing God telling His plans for you to someone else – like Sarah did – would definitely help. But, most likely, that hasn’t happened to you. And truthfully, you don’t expect it to.
So, how can you hear God speak to you?
When I voiced this series of questions in Pregnant with Hope: Good News for Infertile Couples, I had no idea how much it would resonate with people. Everyone experiencing infertility wants to know what’s happening and why… but very few people have any idea about how to get answers.
In the infertility Bible study group, we work on dissecting and examining a verse to unveil the specific promises relevant to the infertility journey. We read aloud, giving the words on the page time to seep into our spirits. Then, we dig deep beneath the surface of the words to the life-giving truths that underlie them. In Pregnant with Hope, I walked readers through that exercise with Jeremiah 29:11.
Let’s do the same thing with Psalm 84:11.
“For the Lord God is a sun and shield; The Lord bestows favor and honor. No good thing does He withhold from those who walk uprightly” [Psalm 84:11].
“For the Lord God is a sun and shield….” The words “sun” and “shield” define God’s vital role in our well-being. He ends the darkness of infertility; He brings light. He is a life-giving power; His presence affects the fertility of living things. He is both protector and defender – rock, fortress, refuge and high tower [Psalm 18:1]. He deflects threats to our well-being and our future. He is always fighting for us, never against us.
“…the Lord bestows favor and honor.” “Bestow” means to give something valuable, often something that is undeserved. Everything God gives us is a valuable, undeserved gift; it cannot – and need not – be earned.
The favor He bestows on us is help in time of need [Hebrews 4:16], and grace that is sufficient for the challenges we face [II Corinthians 12:9]. The honor is that He loves us even when we reject Him – out of fear, pride, resentment, or the desire to control. And, He continues to listen to us, even when we refuse to listen to Him.
“No good thing does He withhold…” All good things are in His hands, and it is in His power to give them. He doesn’t refuse to give us any good thing that would be His best for us. His intention and His deep desire is to bless us.
“…from those who walk uprightly.” This is the qualifier. Is it also the reason for infertility?
Dr. David L. Cooper writes, “Whenever the people of God fail to walk uprightly, their conduct makes it impossible for the Lord, who does all things for the best of His children, to bestow many good things upon them that He would like to.” Meaning? “So long as we follow Him afar off and crowd Him out of our lives, He is unable to bestow [what we desire] upon us.”
Are you following from afar? Or not at all? Have you crowded God out of your life as you struggle to control your infertility and force your solution on your timetable? If so, you have an opportunity to make changes that will invite God back into your story. That is the key that will unlock His promise to give you His very best in His perfect timing.
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For more resources and cause for hope, visit PregnantWithHope.com
Pregnant with Hope 
My husband and I have been married for 6 years. We have tried all sorts of medication, and doctors… I became bitter that we had so many infertility problems and I carried much hate in my heart. My husbands brother had gotten a girl pregnant at a party and it devastated us… here we are living right, married and have a home and live according to Jehovah’s word… then here, these two get drunk and she is pregnant! I immediately had so much hate, fury and disappointment in Jehovah. I swore I’d never love him again. Then one day a man talked with me about my hate towards my husbands brother, the baby and his girlfriend. I asked why did Jehovah bless them and not us… especially when we make all efforts to serve him. I had almost lost all hope. My husband remained stronger in his faith than I did… .however I finally decided I had to forgive my husbands brother, his girlfriend and lastly myself for all the hate. I wholeheartedly forgave them and decided to trust Jehovah for all my needs. I repented for my sin and ask Jehovah to look upon me with love and erase the hatred in my heart. I vowed to serve Jehovah and his son Jesus. I finally trusted them again. The next morning after finding peace with Jehovah and forgiving everyone…. I started my period for the first time in 15 months! Jehovah truly taught me that in order to be blessed by him you have to fully trust, serve, and obey his commandments! In my case starting with … forgiveness and love for thy neighbor! We are not pregnant yet but are standing on Jehovah’s Promises! Praise Jehovah God for all he has done and is yet to do!
Psalms 83:18
God bless you! I had in vitro that failed and many other things that all failed. Then, fasting, prayer, better eating and exercise all made it happen unexpectedly for me. First, I got pregnant. Then, I had a miscarriage. But then, we had a beautiful baby!! Praise God!!
Please dear Lord Jesus hear our prayer:
We desire to have a healthy baby. I had a traumatic marriage where my husband abused me. I finally left. Now, I have a wonderful man. It would be a blessing to share the gift of a healthy child. I am 44 and the doctor says my eggs are too old to have a baby without high risk. I feel that Mark will forever be disappointed if I am unable to share this with him, and may resent me. So, on top of the desire of our heart, I feel such pressure. God please bless us with a healthy baby soon. We have been trying for a year and now are trying fertility treatment. I pray for peace, for a healthy baby, a blessing unto the Lord, her/his parents and her/his family! I pray for this miracle to happen quickly as the treatments are expensive. We need a miracle and we serve a miracle God…..in Jesus name, Amen!