Monthly Archives: January 2011
Infertile Sisters and Baby Wars
What is it about sisterhood that can make infertility so much harder to bear? According to author and therapist Vikki Stark, M.S.W., sister relationships are naturally fraught with competition and conflict. Regardless of which sister initiated the rivalry – or … Continue reading
Secondary Infertility: Mourning vs. Hope
I know a couples counselor who experienced secondary infertility years ago. He and his wife decided that one child was not a whole family, and that – for them – natural conception was the only acceptable road to parenthood. They … Continue reading
Filed under Bystanders, Peace
Victory on God’s Terms
I’ve just finished reading the biography of Rees Howells, a Welsh minister from the early 20th century. It arrived in my mailbox months ago, tattered and disintegrating, held together by a rubber band. A gift from a reader of this … Continue reading
What Infertile Couples Want & Need
What can you say to the people around you who want to love you through the struggle with infertility, but have no idea what to do or how to help? Kathleen Parker, an Opinion columnist for the Washington Post, offered … Continue reading
Filed under Bystanders
A Friend Who Understands Infertility
I saw a tweet yesterday that read, “infertile couples need infertile friends.” At first, I thought, ‘I couldn’t agree more.’ Not because misery loves company; that concept has never made sense to me. When I’m miserable, I want to feel … Continue reading
Filed under Hope
Surprised by Success
Kristi and Carlos met in graduate school and married soon afterward. When they began actively trying to have a family, they had no success. “I had a gut feeling something was wrong,” Kristi remembers. She went to her Ob/Gyn and … Continue reading
Filed under Control, Trust, Uncategorized
Waiting for “the Appointed Time”
How hard is it for you to listen to gratuitous, unsolicited advice? Or to offhand comments like, “Don’t be in such a hurry to get pregnant. Enjoy your freedom!” or “Why don’t you take our kids for a weekend. That’ll … Continue reading
Filed under Perspective, Trust
What’s the Purpose of a Ten Year Journey?
Alesha and Josh were high school sweethearts. They married at 20 and conceived their first baby after 18 months of trying. They lost the baby ten weeks later. Very disappointed but not defeated, they spent the next two years trying … Continue reading
Filed under Control, Speaking Up
Choosing to Do Something for Infertile Couples
In a recent sermon, Andy Stanley, pastor of Northpoint Church, urged his listeners to consider this New Year’s resolution: “Do for one what you wish you could do for everyone.” He was acknowledging the paralysis many people experience in the … Continue reading
Filed under Bystanders, Hope
